The time has come… let’s be real – it has actually been a long time coming.  

We will start with a home health aide next week.  

I have tried my hardest to continue to give Duane as much privacy as possible and help him keep his pride intact for as long I could.  But today during his shower everything went sideways…literally.  

Showers have been getting increasingly harder for the last few weeks.  We have requested aides before but as soon as they show up Duane sends them away.  Well, we have now reached the point where it is a necessity.  

A few days ago when Duane showered we had some difficulties with him staying on the shower chair and me trying to keep his legs stable and wash him.  Today it went so bad I needed his brother to come over and help keep him stable.  I fell and it went downhill from there… hospice will be sending an aide over two times a week starting next week.  

I feel bad that it has come to this but I can’t do it alone anymore, its not safe for either of us.  He is upset and keeps telling me what I did wrong and how to do it (and everything else) better, but we need help – at least for showers.  

Wish us luck!

– xoxo Victoria